Tuesday, January 15, 2013

The Nineties

This era was a challenge. What possible fashion trends had not already been thought of in the 60's, 70's, and 80's?

Oh, yeah, there was this:


I'm not kidding you when I say that whilst shopping in the mall a few weeks ago, my 8 year old and I saw a young, male, red-boxered heinie with pants carefully belted to rest just below the red cheeks of The Scarlet Bottom.
Our fella was number 2.

Kids, when they are 8, are LOUD. Even though the crowds were plenteous that day, I'm pretty certain every shopper in the mall heard my kid yell, "HEY, MOMMY - CHECK OUT THAT DUDE'S RED UNDERWEAR. WHY IS HE SHOWING HIS UNDERWEAR? HIS PANTS ARE HANGING BELOW HIS UNDERWEAR. AND IT IS RED. RED UNDERWEAR."

Neat! Now women can do it too!

There have been times when I have been embarrassed by my kid's loud voice, but this was not one of those times. I felt like doing a cheerleader flip coupled with a Siss Boom Bah. Instead, I bought her ice cream.

Then there was the Rachel:

Everyone wore that for a while. Everyone. Even those who should not have.
You're so lovely and beautiful and I admire you so much but girlfriend do not ever do this again

And the grill. Is that still a thing? I don't know... young whippersnappers.... now in my day we tried to keep the metal off our teeth, but knock yourselves out, kids. 

Boot-cut pants were in, which I liked, since they disguised my cankles. But, some people wore those pants really long, with really high heels. At some point, that look begins to resemble horse legs, and I'm talking the steeds that pull a beer wagon.

At that point, when we were all running around with red underwear and horse legs, the millennium ended. We're now in the noughts, and there are no fashion trends that I can see, beyond Taylor Swift's ringlets and designers refusing to create dresses with sleeves (yes, I'm still ticked about that.)
Sleeves. They are pretty. Take note, designers.

But I'm happy to be taught otherwise.

1 comment:

Rachel Tsoumbakos said...

OMGs Allie your posts ALWAYS crack me up! As for fashion in the noughties, in Australia anyway, it seems the 80s are back baby! Which means my wardrobe in no longer redundant...;-)