I burst into flames on the beach, so I'm really good at applying self-tanner. Not to look tanned, you understand. Somewhat normal is my goal.
Self-tanner FAIL, poor dear. |
I can create a dinner for my husband from the last of the Panko breadcrumbs, that one last chicken breast, and mayo. And rosemary; for crap's sake, don't forget the rosemary!
If a surprise guest will arrive in 30 minutes, I can create the illusion of cleanliness. Just don't open the door of the closet or the Dora Tent.
Love this thing. You can shovel a lot of stuff in here. |
I can extricate myself from any conversation on politics.
I can spend 200 $ on groceries and realize as I pull into the driveway that I haven't actually bought anything to eat.
I can sit through the ninetieth showing of "Good Luck Charlie, It's Christmas!" and enjoy it.
I can also extricate myself from any volleyball pick up game ever.
Here are some things that I can't do:
I can't find my husband, The Great Disappearing Act, when breakfast is ready.
I can't make my kid throw away any of her stuffed animals. (Sweetie, one more round of gift giving and Daddy and I will have to sleep in the garage, ok?)
Nor can I organize my desk. My friend can move two things and all of a sudden everything is in order, but I just don't have that gene.
I cannot resist any dish made with black olives. Ditto mushrooms.
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Oh yeah. Bring it on. |
Breakfast is ready (Jersey blueberries, fresh cantaloupe, and waffles) and I have to go and shout in vain for my husband.
Please, in the interim, share some talents and challenges of your own!
This really made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteI particularly like the cleanliness one when visitors are due in 30 minutes :)
It's amazing how motivated you are to clean when guests are on the way :)